Amazon Prime Day. It’s like Christmas in July. Like most people, I love a good deal - which is what Amazon promises on Prime Day(s).
This Prime Day I wanted an air purifier. A sensible purchase, I told myself. I recently moved into a new apartment that has a bit of a funky smell so I also justified this desire as a “need.” So, I got on Amazon and I started reading through the reviews and looking for the most powerful air purifier with the lowest sale price. …And then I started seeing all the ads. Not ads for air purifiers (though there were some of those), but ads for any and everything else. Suddenly I’m telling myself I need this hair styling tool - never mind that I try to use minimal heat tools on my hair. Oh, maybe I need a new set of AirPods, or that instant photo printer, or some random kitchen gadget that promises to make my diet healthier and my life easier. And then, my social media flooded with reels about Prime Day deals and how to find the best ones, and articles about “21 weird things you need to get this Prime Day” and the news was even doing segments on what to buy on Prime Day!
I got on here for an air purifier. Now I’m thinking about all these things I’m being told I “need” for one reason or another and I’m left feeling like I’m lacking because I don’t have them, and honestly, can’t afford them.
If you’re anything like me, your daily life was or is flooded with messages that make you feel like you need more, more, more. More things, more experiences, just more… And you’re left feeling like you don’t have enough…or maybe even that you’re not enough…
Logically, we all know that this is a trick of marketers; to make you feel like you’ll be happier and more fulfilled if you buy their product. But it’s hard not to fall for it.
Thankfully, I was able to recognize what was happening and pull myself out of the need-more-spiral before I got lost down the rabbit hole of adding more and more to my cart. How did I do this? I’ve learned one simple practice that actively combats these daily messages that try to make me think I’m lacking.
That practice is: Gratitude.
I know, I know, gratitude seems like such a buzz topic, and maybe it’s been over-talked about…but maybe there’s a reason everyone’s promoting a shift towards a grateful mindset.
When I first started hearing about gratitude practices, I was skeptical, and frankly, a little annoyed. I say “thank you” for things (maybe even too much. Did I need to thank the security guard standing at the door to TJ Maxx? He didn’t do anything except nod at me…) Point is, I say “thank you” a lot. I’m grateful. [Insert shrugging emoji here].
But, after hearing about gratitude practices off and on for quite a while (it’s probably safe to say years), I finally heard the practice put into words in a way that resonated with me. After that, I set my skepticism aside and decided to give the act of gratitude a try. I’m not perfect at practicing gratitude daily, but now, with years of experience, I can say that it has completely changed my outlook.
I’m going to assume that if you clicked on a blog post about gratitude, there’s something about the concept that interests you too. So, let’s dive into gratitude a little more. What is it? Why is it important? And what are some ways that we can practice it?
What is gratitude?
Gratitude is more than just an emotion; it is the act of consciously acknowledging the positive aspects of life — big and small. This means that gratitude is not a passive process. We’re not talking about a fleeting “someone held the door open for me. ‘Thank you.’ I’ve now moved on with the rest of my day and two minutes later forgot that kind act of a stranger.” The practice of gratitude is just that. A practice. It is choosing to appreciate something good.
Why is it important?
Why are so many people advocating for gratitude? In short, because practicing gratitude has been shown to have a striking positive impact on physical and psychological health. Just a few of these benefits include:
• Improved sleep
• Stronger immunity
• Increased self-esteem
• Decreased stress
• Decreased blood pressure
• Decreased depression and anxiety
• Increased levels of optimism
• Stronger relationships
• And greater life satisfaction
But don’t take my word for it. There are countless academic studies and research articles about the effects of gratitude that you can read for yourself.
So, what now? What are some ways to practice gratitude?
Practicing gratitude is about moving our focus from what we lack to what we have. Here is where it actively combats those social media feeds that constantly bombard us with new products, we “need” or exotic experiences we “need” to have. Practicing gratitude can help against this daily barrage of being told we need more, more, more, by helping us foster a mindset of abundance instead of one of scarcity.
Here are some ideas of how to practice gratitude:
1. My favorite: at the end of the day, list at least three things you’re grateful for from that day. This helps move you away from the general “I’m grateful for my house. I’m grateful for my car.” These are definitely things we should be grateful for! And if you just got a new car or your dream house, then maybe those are things for your daily list. But they’re also general things that you could be grateful for any and every day. The idea behind this specific gratitude practice is that it helps you look for things throughout your day to be grateful for. If you know you have to list three things from the day, then you’ll spend your day looking for things to be grateful for. I find this practice to be very useful for shifting your mindset because you start to overlook the minor inconveniences and start to magnify the “little” good things.
• “I got a front row parking spot at the grocery store so I didn’t have to walk far in the heat!”
• “I’m grateful for the cookies my coworker brought into work. It was nice to feel appreciated and get a little surprise treat.”
• “I’m grateful for the beautiful flowers on my walk today. I’m glad I was able to take the time to notice and appreciate the beauty that I normally walk by without thought.”
• And to pull from our earlier example, “I’m grateful for the person that held the door open for me today. It reminded me that there is still kindness in the world and it was a small gesture that made me feel seen today.”
2. If you’re a Believer, you could try gratitude prayers. I find that my prayers often fall into, “God, please do xyz…” or “give me abc…” But, when I take the time to focus a prayer only on things that I’m grateful for, and thanking God for them, I find I have so many more blessings than I may have realized.
3. Similarly, to a gratitude prayer, you can keep a tried-and-true gratitude journal. Prayer and journaling can go hand in hand if you want them to. Whether you combine it with prayer or not, writing things can help you process emotions and thoughts, clear your mind, and even help you think of or realize things you hadn’t thought about much before. Maybe it will reveal things you can be grateful for that you hadn’t thought of in those terms before!
4. Practice gratitude with others. Find a partner, a friend, or a family member to practice gratitude with. In some ways, this can work as an accountability partner if you need it, where you can both share things, you’re grateful for with each other, and/or, practice sharing gratitude with others by expressing gratitude tothem. Acknowledgement and sincere gratitude can mean a lot to people, especially when they’ve done something nice for you. This helps to promote gratitude in you, and shares positivity with others. This could even help to strengthen your relationships!
I made a bold statement earlier, claiming that practicing gratitude has totally changed my outlook. What does that mean, you might wonder. Am I just hyperbolizing the effects on my life because I’m writing this blog? Not at all. Since practicing gratitude, I truly have noticed a shift in my mindset to automatically lending towards gratefulness. I find myself taking a moment to thank God, in the moment, when something good happens. I find myself noticing beautiful things more (those examples I gave earlier on practice #1 are real!) And I was able to escape Prime Day with buying only what I set out to get and not being seduced into buying more.
Every day last week, I listed three things I was grateful for every day. Of those 21 things I listed, only one was about being grateful for the great deal I found on an air purifier (I am not bashing Prime Day or saying that shopping is bad - I was really grateful to have gotten the thing I wanted for 60+% off!) At the end of the week, I listed out my favorite memories from the week. And on that list - not one was about my Prime Day purchase, or even any other ‘things.’ It was all about time spent with people I love, or time that I spent alone meaningfully. I ended the week with such a feeling of abundance and joy and just generally feeling blessed because I turned my thoughts from what the world is trying to tell me I lack to acknowledging and choosing to be grateful for what I already have.
And if this air purifier breaks or I choose to send it back tomorrow, that feeling of abundance and joy won’t be shaken because it doesn’t depend on things I bought.
So no, I’m not hyperbolizing my experience or just making this up (see my earlier invitation to look the research up for yourself!) I really do believe in this conscious and active practice because I’ve seen the good it does for me - and I’ve seen it work for others!
But a note for you, if you already practice gratitude, or you’re thinking about trying out a gratitude practice, please remember this one thing: this is meant to enhance your life, not take from it. This is not meant to feel like an obligation that you’ll feel guilty about if you miss a day (or a month). Building a new habit takes time, and nobody is marking you down (or up) for how well or how often you do it. Just think of practicing gratitude as another tool to help you cultivate a positive mindset and a happy and healthy life!
Kailee Rogers
LPC-Associate #95097
Supervised by Deana Reed, LPC-S #68220
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